My Latest Thinks

My friends have been asking what I've been doing during this time of self isolation. I would love to say that I have been writing my next novel. Nope. I have a draft, a really rough draft, of a bit of memoirs, that I started at least 10 years ago. Every time I  open the file, I delete a little bit more of the manuscript. I've also got another novel in my brain that just isn't writing itself down. 

Even my blogs have become just a place where abandoned and unpublished drafts go to die.  It's been about 3 years since I last wrote anything and posted it. 

So today, I set a timer for 20 minutes and then I will publish  whatever I've got on my Random Thinks blog. No more sitting in front of a blank screen for hours trying to squeeze words out of my brain and transfer them onto a suitable platform to share. Even if I end up with a couple hundred words before I decide what I am writing about. Like a stream of consciousness session. No pressure. 

Who am I kidding: the pressure is still on. Dang. I am thinking about what I can say about my life. 

And that's my time today. Wow, 20 minutes goes by fast. I will stick with my plan, though, and give you readers (if there is anyone actually reading this, a bit more content.

Muddling through the Murky Middles

You know you are middle aged when . . .

     . . . you realize that you have not become your mother after all. Somehow, you skipped right into becoming your grandmother!

     . . . you and your friends have stopped one-upping each other's horror stories from labour pains and the delivery room, and have been  comparing notes on your collection of ailments and  syndromes.

         . . .  you still buy the sexy nightie, but now you wonder how it will look with your incontinence brief underneath.


        . . . . Your back and your knees plead with you to stay home, but your bank account says you have to go to work.  

Here's to all of us muddling  through the murky middles. Soon enough we will be joining the grey hair crowd, but for now, what happens at the hair salon is still magic.

More Middled Aged Moments

Again, if you clicked here looking for content about the Middle Ages, you are in the wrong blog. You have to grow up a little before you are ready for this blog. When you start walking into a room  and forget why, and when your back goes out more often than you do, then you might be living in the middle ages.


I had a middle muddled moment while doing physiotherapy stretches just now. I contemplated turning on the TV to keep me company while I work out, and then I thought, no --that might be distracting. I am trying to count to 20 and that requires all of my concentrational skills.

When did I get this old?


These days, I have to change my glasses every time I sit down at the computer. My eye doctor said it was time for trifocals! Am I really that old? I'm still not so keen on bifocals. When I watch TV in bed, I have to get my pillows just right so my head is at the right angle to see the TV through the top part of my glasses. So I asked the doctor if I could get a second pair of glasses instead of trifocals. He said that he has done that for several people and most of them come back to say they are tired of changing glasses all the time.

Oy! This getting old stuff is getting old. Did I already say that? Sorry, I had the wrong glasses on, now I see it.

People in the Middle Ages

You know that you are hitting the Middle Ages . . .

 . . .when you start laughing at jokes like this, instead of rolling your eyes.

 If you clicked on this post because you thought it would be about  medieval fairs, 
I am sorry, but you are in the wrong blog.
Kindly move along. You don't want to know this stuff yet.
(Your time is coming soon enough.)

Middle age kinda sneaks up on you, doesn't it?
Like when you realize that people your age are becoming grandparents.
Grandparents used to be old;
But now they are middle aged, just like you!

If your middle starts to muddle,
 And you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror when you get out of the shower.
 and what you see frightens you so much
that you run the hot water until the mirror gets fogged up properly.
You may be hitting middle age.

You know that you are hitting middle age
When you do the math and realize that your age times two equals more than 100.
If you had to use a calculator to do that math, you are probably not middle aged.
You are either a millennial, or a 5-year-old prodigy at reading but not math.

If you had to use a calculator to figure out how old you are, 
you might be hitting middle age.

You know you are hitting middle age
When you realize that you went from being:
 a wanna beto a has been,Without ever just

... being....

If you suspect that you might be Middle Aged,

And have not yet been what you wanted to be; 

You might still have time! 

I always wanted a career in a medical field, 

And now I am a full time patient!

(It's not the most lucrative medical field, But hey -- life is about more than money, right?)

(plus that's just a joke. I wanted to be a teacher, and I got to be one, just not for as long as I had planned) 

(And by the way, if you can read this, then maybe you are not middle aged yet after all!)

Is it Just Me . . .?

Is it just me, or:

• Is the floor getting farther away every year? It's getting to be harder to pick stuff up. I don't know what kind of phenomena this is, but my feet are farther away too.
  
  
• Are they making the small print smaller? This has got to be a conspiracy of  enormous proportions, because small print is getting smaller on everything: pill bottles, directions on labels, all of the buttons on my phone, and the dashboard of the car. The conspiracy is getting so widespread that my computer is affected. I used to use a 10 or 12 point size from most fonts, but now that they have changed size I can't even see the 10 point, never mind read it! I have to use a 12 or 14.
  

• Have they put a  sensor on computers that prompts the unit to go to sleep as soon as the user comes back from a break? I don't know how often, but too much to be just a coincidence, the screen fades to black as soon as I sit down.

So is it just me, or are other people noticing conspiracies and coincidences going on around them?